Fine...

I've mentioned before how tricky I am to live with. Well...I was being nice. I'm also frequently an emotional roller coaster AND I don't tell anyone. Think on that...
I've been pretty worried about James lately. His health has been stagnant. I mean, we're ok (fine). Not like I think we're headed to the hospital soon, but more like...'so is this it...?'
And the last cold hit him pretty hard. Add that to typical life stress, small children nonsensicalness (it's a word), business stress (we have 2 of them too), all sorts of crap....well, basically we had a lady bug influx one afternoon and some (a shit ton) came inside, which happens out here, and I um....I fruck out. Ugly cried. For a long time. While vacuuming lady bugs.
The good thing about this is that when your children see you lose it completely...they're usually ridiculously good for the rest of the day. Shock and awe. I'm all about it.
Anyway, the other thing looming over my head was this big blood draw we were going to have to do as soon as the kit arrived. Not only cause it's stressful for all, but because the amount of blood is A LOT for a 29 lb child. Basically he's donating blood. For this particular test, I had to collect a fasting AM urine, separate it into tubes and make sure it was enough they were full, freeze them for 2 hours before leaving for the dr to have the blood drawn, where our amazing phlebotomist was taking care of all the other stuff. How to make sure all this happened was making my head spin, cause if anything didn't get done properly, the whole thing has to be redone. If they couldn't get ALL the blood, the test doesn't really work. Luckily Tom knows me well enough now (one would hope) that he was aware that until this was completed, I was....not really okay. At least we know! In fact, I voiced it. I said, "until this is all done, can we just allow me to not be ok?" (Enter dramatic hand gestures here).
To which Tom replied, "yep."
He gets me.
So here's how the day has gone.
3:30am- wake James to pee in cup.
Never really go back to sleep and whenever doze off, have dream about messing up pee collection, or dream about Tom messing it up which I've still not recovered from violent feelings of.
5am- wake James again for more pee. Success! Separate into tubes and get it in freezer. Make coffee and sit in dark reading and snapchatting with book Whoreders cause they're as weird as me.
7am- pack up all stuff, plus Halloween stuff for tomorrow at school plus gfcf cupcakes I made for another kid's bday at school cause I'm a control freak and need James (and Kristen's kids) to eat my food that I know every ingredient of.
Get kids dressed and Eve fed. Pack up meat as gift to nurse for going above and beyond.
7:45- start 45 min drive to dr.
Appt at 8:30am. Done by 9 with draw. Held James for about 15 min drinking chocolate pediasure to make sure he doesn't faint. Eat snack, bathroom, play with waiting room toys.
9:30am- head to toy store for some major overcompensation. Check.
Now we are off to school after another snack. Results not back for about 3 weeks. Soooo...for now...we're fine.
Fine.
....fine...